In the Secret Garden of Sweden

January 16th, 2010 → by Erica Johansson

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“Before I ever set foot in Sweden I knew for sure that Swedes were socialists, that they drank themselves to death and that they had sex anywhere at any time. Now that I’ve been here for a few years I know that only one of these is true.” — Colin Moon

swedish flag In the Secret Garden of Sweden

Last year I read the book In the secret garden of Sweden, in which communications expert Colin Moon looks at everyday ‘normal’ things in Sweden from a different perspective.  While I don’t agree with all of his observations on us Swedes, I must say many of them were spot on.

Swedes always talk about the weather

We do. At least frequently. With such distinct seasons and at times unpredictable changes in weather, we have a lot of sub-topics to draw from.

Swedes don’t like to brag

I feel very uncomfortable bragging and I bet the majority of Swedes feel the same. We would much rather let our accomplishments speak for themselves. It’s considered tasteless to brag about your achievements or how financially successful you are.

Every Swedes mobile phone call starts with the obligatory question “Where are you?”

And if we don’t ask “where are you?”, we say “what are you doing?”. Basically the same because regardless of which question you ask, the reply you receive will often answer both questions.

In the summer, Swedes ignore dress-codes and walk around semi-naked

Pretty much true. Travel to Malmö, Båstad, Halmstad or any other city in southern Sweden during the summer and you will understand what Colin means.

Swedes will ask you about weekend plans as early as Wednesday afternoon

On Monday and Tuesday, we have the whole week in front of us. But on Wednesday, the weekend is basically here.

When a Swede says anything with the word ‘process’ on the end, you know that the whole procedure is going to take some time

Correct. The decision making process in Sweden takes time.

“Let me have some time to think about it. I’m not really sure. It depends. What I can do now is give you a definite maybe.” — a Swedish boss

coffee In the Secret Garden of Sweden

If Swedes skipped their coffee breaks, they could retire five years earlier

A funny guesstimation. We do enjoy our coffee breaks. Very. Much.

Swedes like to be in time and on time

Nearly all of us value punctuality and dislikes those who show up late.

Swedish teenagers express a burning desire to be different by dressing exactly the same

I couldn’t help but laugh when I read this. Looking back, I remember the majority of my friends shopped in the same clothing stores and it was more a norm than a rarity that someone wore an identical skirt/top/sweater/dress as you.

Swedes are the world’s greatest individualists

For Swedes, independence is important. According to the World Values Survey by American sociology professor Ronald Inglehart, no other country is as individually oriented as Sweden. Family is important but we believe that relationships between people have to be based on equality. Real love can only be possible if one partner isn’t dependent on the other.

A typically Swedish person is bureaucratic, inflexible and indecisive

Yes. But, I must add, I am NOT a typically Swedish person.

Swedes will gladly talk about their aches and pains as many times as possible

Unfortunately I have found this to be true (and I was once one of them). Nowadays, I must be a rare exception.

Swedes are good and safe drivers

I couldn’t agree more.

Apart from these and other observations, Colin Moon shares misconceptions such as that all Swedish girls have blonde hair and blue eyes (far from true), different quotes on Swedes, and various facts about Sweden.

“Golf and sex are the only two things Swedes can enjoy without being any good at them.” — A Swedish golf-player

golf In the Secret Garden of Sweden

Some interesting facts about Sweden according to Colin Moon:

“At the time of the writing 276,131 were called Johansson — the most common family name in Sweden.”

I wouldn’t mind having a less ordinary name.

“Every year, evening papers print pages and pages with complete details of the income, tax bills and wealth status of the rich and famous.”

I have never been included on these lists.

“Swedes have a fair share of public holidays. In a good year they take as many days off in May and June as most Americans take in a year.”

And this we are incredibly grateful for.

“A well-known recipe book, Sju sorters kakor (Seven types of cake) is outsold only by the bible.”

I remember having read this book on several occasions. And I don’t refer to the bible.

book garden of sweden In the Secret Garden of SwedenBefore wrapping up, I want to point out one of the observations I don’t agree with.

If a stranger smiles at a Swede in the street, he or she is either a) drunk b) insane c) American

I’s a funny quote but people do smile at each other more and more these days — without getting accused of being neither of the above.

Well written, excellently researched and repeatedly amusing, In the secret garden of Sweden offers an insight into Swedes’ habits and the Swedish culture.

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